resolutions.

another few more minutes to a new day, a new month and a new year. and before that happen, i'd like to apologize, to appreciate and to reminisce each and everything that happened through the year. many things happened and there's always a reason behind it. i don't know if i've changed, either worse or better, but all i know is i've become more matured than ever. 2008 is over and 2009, here i come.

so, these are my new year's resolutions :

1) i will revise at least 3 hours per day. do you think i'll do that?
2) i will stop complaining about other people. like i will?
3) i will stop having scandals. hihihi.
4) i will stop having boyfriends. haha.
5) i will score my bio, chemist and physics.
6) i will only online on weekends. this is hard
7) i will pay my library fines. xD
8) i will stop thinking erotic thoughts at school hours. :)
9) i will exercise everyday. to lose weight and gain height actually >.<
10) i will forget about my 2008 and have a happy and wonderful 2009 :D

Bukan Superstar

okei people, lots of you guys wanna know what song exactly in my friendster, right? so, this is the song and the video. there's lyric down there as well. and yea, you should take a look at the vid, it's hilarious. :D



Project Pop - Bukan Superstar
Andai aku Pasha Ungu
semua wanita kan memburuku
Bila aku Ariel Peterpan
kau yakin ngefans karena gua keren

Haa haa haaa… Haa haa haaa…

Sexy badannya.. Mulan Jameela
cantiknya dia seperti aku
Giring Nidji sahabat aku
dekat denganku.. dialah aku..

Tapi kenyataan aku bukan siapa-siapa
kuingin engkau mencintaiku apa adanya

Ku bukan superstar kaya dan terkenal
Ku bukan saudagar yang punya banyak kapal
Ku bukan bangsawan, ku bukan priyayi
Ku hanyalah orang yang ingin dicintai

Haa haa haaa… Haa haa haaa…

Andai ku Letto wis pasti aku wong jowo
Tapi kenyataan aku bukan siapa-siapa
kuingin engkau mencintaiku apa adanya

Ku bukan superstar kaya dan terkenal
Ku bukan saudagar yang punya banyak kapal
Ku bukan bangsawan, ku bukan priyayi
Ku hanyalah orang yang ingin dicintai

Kata orang ku mirip Glenn Fredly
suara merdu, wanita jatuh hati
Namun semua itu hanya mimpi bagimu woohoo~

Jadi… semua itu hanya mimpi?
Ya iya laah… masya ya iya dong
duren aja dibelah bukan dibedong

Ku bukan superstar kaya dan terkenal
Ku bukan saudagar yang punya banyak kapal
Ku bukan bangsawan, ku bukan priyayi
Ku hanyalah orang yang ingin dicintai

Kamu bukan super, kamu bukan setar
Kalo digabungin kamu bukan supersetarr..
Ku bukan bangsawan, ku bukan priyayi
Ku hanyalah orang yang ingin dicintai
Haa haa haaa… Haa haa haaa…

i bet ya, you'll love this song ! drop comments at my tagboard. :D

today.

Alhamdulillah

finally, the cat is out of the bag. thank God i managed to control my emotions. everything is revealed and yeah, i got 8As + 1B.


so, my chinese ruined my whole results. but anyway, i'm not gonna commit suicide because of it. calm down people! come'on, i got two years more to go for SPM. besides, i'm not married yet! why should i give up? btw, i've done my best and this is the results.

well, it's not the matter of the product we've produced but it's the matter of effort that we've attempted. to be honest, i could see a lil dissapointment in my dad's eyes. perhaps i've dissapointed him. yes i do. but no worries dad, i'll do my bestest for my SPM in the future.

my appreciation goes to ---

1) my family : my mumy, abah, my bro, my lil sis :)

2) my teachers : Mdm Salwia, Mdm Jammansia, Miss Yap, Miss WSL, Mdm Thien, Miss Sandra, Mdm Lee, Mr Maulana and all SMSP's teachers.

3) my friends : niza, fazrina, diana, becca, izza, julayha, joey, wong suk yee, siti, nurnabilah and etc. they helped a lot.

4) and most of all, ALLAH. the one and only God. aminnn.

5)and not to forget, my books, pens, dictionaries, and my bag :D

and to all PMR candidates, i wish to convey my special CONGRATULATIONS to those who get straight As. and for those who didn't manage to achieve their target; no worries guys, the journey is not over yet, it'll be another destiny for all of you. don't be sad okei?

once again, cheers for me although it's not a straight As result. thanks a lot to those who have helped me a lot along my journey. i've gone throught minutes and seconds with the presence of you guys. thanks thanks thanks. :D

tomorrow.

30th of December,
the day after today,
the day when everything will change,
the day where everything will be revealed,
the day how am i gonna face the truth,
that i've waited for so long and finally, here it comes.

it comes without any hesitation but it hesitates me.
it comes without any reasons but there's a reason for me.
it comes without any choices and i've no choice but to face it.

it is so near but it seems so far,
it is always the only one yet unreachable.
it is the only mystery til it'd become my curiosity,
but it'll be no longer irritates me when tomorrow comes by its own mystery.

it is the flower of what i've planted,
it is the product of what i've produced,
it is the effort of what i've attempted for,
and it is the answer of what i'm searching for.

yes, the PMR RESULTS.

pray for me guys. i guess i couldn't sleep tonight. all i've wanted from you guys are your encourage and blessings. but no matter what happen, i know i'm gonna face it 'cause tomorrow never dies.

Ya Allah, berikanlah aku kekuatan untuk menghadapi apa yang telah Engkau tentukan, ya Allah. Sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Besar lagi Maha Kuasa. aku redha Ya Allah. amin.

reflection.

took stock of my appearance in the mirror today. i have only grown a couple of inches for the whole year. it really sounds terrible. i'm now 15 and my height is just *** cm? no, i'm gonna eat as much calcium as i can ! i must do that for the sake of myself ! now, i must reconcile myself to the fact that i will be the one of those people who never get a good view in the cinema. unless i sat alone in the cinema hall, i suppose to.

let's get the story short, i'm SHORT !
damn ! how am i suppose to grow taller?
please people, i'm begging here, could y'all give me some tips to grow taller?
especially those mr and miss galah, will ya?

urgh, and next year, i'm no longer 15. i'm 16 ! another two years for me to grow until i stop growing on my 18th year of living in this world. plus, i'm gaining weight right now?! gosh, i'm gonna ban myself from eating rice. rice is fattening me !

but thank God, my ass and thighs are shrinking right now. hahah. an improvement i guess. and overall, i failed three relationships this year. i'm always a failure in lovey-dovey. perhaps it's not my time yet but at least, it's a remarkable achievement, don't you think so? how many love failure that have the same achievement like me in this world? so, i'm the so-called failure. hah hah hah. =.=

as a child of fifteen, it's a fact for me to face my biggest doom ever, PMR results. how do you feel when almost everyone is hoping for ya? even the principal of the school? how do you feel when people think you're the only one?

okei, i'm taking 9 subjects for my pmr. it's a high risk cuz i'm taking chinese for the extra subject. chinese is not my mother tongue, not my culture either. i'm a malay but i mix with chinese since i was three. i speak chinese 12 hours out of 24 hours, to my friends and even to my siblings. but it really freaks me out. i just don't know if i could score my chinese. same goes to my Agama Islam. huh. i'm so dead.

so, i'm gonna make my new year's resolutions right after i get my results. i really need to improve myself, especially my height and weight ! urgh. and plus plus, i'm wearing tudung to school next year. it's gonna be a huge change next year. be prepared, patricians ! :D

neglected.

so, this is what happened when the new things came. the olds are neglected and bcome unfortunate. look at my such devoted companion, yellow-mellow Ford Ranger which was no longer a loyal company i consider, is left outside in the middle of the night. whereas Ford Lynx, my mom's ex-favourite were neglected after the arrival of the brand new white pearl creature, Toyota Camry.



don't ask me about the blur capture, it's actually caused by my dad who loves to move while picture was snapped.



and don't blame the lil girl, she's just my temporary model which is unpaid or in other word, free model. LOL.



so people, it was a remarkable achieving considering since i've written the longest post ever! once again, cheers for me! this is my pay for not scribble anything for almost two weeks. btw, choose TOYOTA over FORD cuz i heard FORD is having some economic problem and it's gonna bankrupt soon. that's what i heard from the news recently. until then my longer post. chow :)

it's not over :[

to someone who suppose to read this :[

i don't understand. i miss you damn much but do i love you? every time you broke my heart, i broke down. every time you left me, i felt so lonely. every time you said sorry, i felt so guilty. what is actually happening to me? i just couldn't understand.

i'm falling apart, i weep and weep, cry and cry, broke into pieces and every tears down like razorblades, i couldn't help myself. it's like i'm playing in my own game alone, feeling lonely, so lonely. despite of my loneliness, are you willing to share your laughter with me? or your tears perhaps? no, you won't do that. you'll never do that. what exactly i am to you? who am i? i'm nothing.

i lose myself in all these fights, i lose my sense of wrong and right. i couldn't decide. am i wrong or it's you? i'm not the one to blame, same goes to you. if it's no one's fault, why is it over? it can't be over. why shouldn't it be over and over again? why shouldn't it be forever? i wish that i could take it back, bring back all the happiness to you. but i know i couldn't. and the only words that can heal everything is a sincere apology. i'm so sorry :[

a long night.

it's been a long night yesterday.
the cat is out of the bag, everything is revealed and finally everything is solved. i'm so glad everything is getting better now.
but still, there's gap between us that we couldn't say certain things to each other. we're just not ready yet.

it was all started when i received an unknown miss call and that person is, fariza, my school mate. we're friends but we don't really know each other like her other friends. we used to share our laughter together but we never shared our miserables but last night, we did. she asked me about him, and i confessed everything to her. i have no one else to talk to. even my besties couldn't understand me. it's too complicated. and perhaps she could be the one who can help me. so, we talked. she told me to get back with him, i just don't know. i kept thinking about it all night.

when i was in the midst of sending him a message, he sent me one. his message really make me reminicse our bygone days. it takes a while for him to reply me back and me either. i felt really guilty and the only thing that i can do is to give him a sincere apology. same goes to him. he told me that he's the one who suppose to say apology. but i was part of it too, i should apologize too for saying such crude words to him. i'm way too rusty that time that i couldn't help myself till i wrote such a word in my blog. and for the sake of everyone, i deleted that 'curse' post.

i'm glad both of us could handle everything. maybe that apology couldn't heal our damage but at least we're trying our best to make it better and i believe things will get better in time. we just need some time. and i realized, without such a thing happened, we never realize there's mistake in our relationship, we would never be more matured than ever like now.

and i would like to dedicate a special thanks to fariza cuz without her, i don't think i could settle this alone. you've helped me a lot :)

my first crush :)

gee. wee. bee. hihi. crush crush crush. well, i'm a human being and YES i do crush on someone. yeaa, it's normal and i admit it. so, i've told y'all that i met someone in my last post, right? gheez, he's actually my so-called first crush. but sadly, he didn't even notice me. but anyway, got to tell y'all bout him. he's way too cool for me. YES, no kidding. :)

well, frankly, he's not that handsome, not even tall, not a genius either. *chehh, macam sak aku pandai btul*. till now, i'll smile on my own when i reminisce back the bygone days where i crushed on him that MUCH till i told my friends about him. i just can't help myself! you can't blame me for that!

so about him, he's just a simple guy and that's what i like about him! i like the way he walks, the way he talks, the way he acts. he's just HIM. specifically about him, he's one year older than me. gosh, he's CHUBBY !! *well, not a big, fat SUMO-fighter of course*. he's soo soo cute ! gosh, how could i like someone chubby, i wonder. so, he's really chubby. okei, stop it. maybe i like him JUST because he's chubby and now i'm no longer crush on him. look at him, he's so skinny now, more handsome, and he still didn't notice me. fine. i'm just his temporary admirer. i never crushed on someone like i did to HIM. he's such a special guy but now, he's no longer that special. he's just common like any guy else in this world, cuz yeaa, he's not that chubby again. haha. *i'm still wondering why i love chubby guys that much*

it was my first step to secondary school when everything started. gheez, he's a prefect and me too. so, we often get together but still, he didn't notice me. fine. it had been my hobby to watch everything he did, every step he walked, each and every time he looked at me. hihi. but he seldom noticed me. i'm just so, invincible, so nothing to look at. urghh. i'm just that INVISIBLE. i wonder he noticed me or not by now. urgh. whatever.

so when we met each other that day, he did look at me. i just don't know but he looked like he's so shocked. perhaps my sense of style in kk is way too different with mine in tawau, plus my big, huge but funky handbag *that i loved damn much*, he looked at me weirdly. it seems like he didn't look at me for ages ! maybe i looked too bulky with my huge bag and finally he noticed me? i wonder. =.='

well, i'm not going to say his name here but the only hint is that, his name ends with 'R' and he's in form 4 now. maybe some of you guys might know who he is. hihi. but anyway, i didn't crush on him that much since i had a 'relationship' with one of his close friends. so, he's over. we, girls are so not pizza that you can call and get 15 minutes later! *that's what sheena taught me* haha. that phrase is way too unique ! haha. i loved it damn much sheena ! so, the highlight for today --- girls are not pizza. LOL.

p.s : i bought this pair of shoes which was damn cute plus cool ! plus, it was sold in great price. WHY NOT ? and plus plus, i'm so skint now cuz i've spent almost all of my money! gosh. i have to make a budget by now.

so, gtg, testis and comments will be replied ASAP. i'm freaking busy right now. :)

i love this song !

Crush by David Archuleta

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

short.

just came back from cp. saw someone unexpectedly. urghh. =.=

so, i'm at kk right now. we arrived at 6pm just now. fyi, we drove here. so, that's all for today. i'm tired.
so looking forward to meet you, myaa :)

p/s : i haven't reply sis benben's tag yet. i forgot to bring my PRECIOUS card reader. DAMN !! so, my blog is really lack of pictures.

P.P.S : i'm freaking lazy to type right now. that's all for today. thanks for reading. -.-

away from tawau

once again, i'll be far away from my hometown. going to another place, which is much much better than tawau. but anyway, i'm gonna miss my tawau for sure. :)

so, i'm going to KK tomorrow until the 18th and after that, i'll spend my another two weeks time in Sandakan. i miss my sepilok's babun damn much ! perhaps some of you knew the reasons why i long them that much. uhh, just forget it. and'and, i'm so looking forward to meet you too, Myaa! yes, myaa, she's my coconut and i'm soo soo jealous at her, cuz she owns OCTOPUS which i didn't have yet ! :[ so, i'm gonna buy one. and just a few days ago, i saw this one octopus, exactly like Mya's and it had a great price ! but i think i've got to change my mind. perhaps i should have another kind of pet, maybe a snake or an elephant will do? uh, whatever, as long as it didn't cause me to get a flu !

so KK, here i come ! goodbye, TAWAU !

p/s : i got two more tags to go. one from farahin and another one from sis benben. maybe i'll complete it after my vacation. so sorry my dear ! :)

Mr. Right.

Right. this post is all about Mr. Right.
*specially dedicated to esther, my understanding ex-senior.

so, esther had posted a special post just for me ! i mean ME ! *flaterring* who would have done such a great thing to me? *excited* haha. so, she's having the same problem with me which is about relationship. actually, i didn't expect people would read my post about my breaking up thingy cuz it was absolutely boring. i'm not the type that who would be emotional when people left me alone. left me without any sympathy. i'm not the one who would cry badly, rolling on the floor desperately, thinking of someone who dumped me without any reason with all my tears! well, i'm the type of people who would HATE someone once he broke my heart. look, i'm a crude + rude + sarcastic person, who would go balistic with no reason and slam anything in front of me when i'm just not in the mood. so, i don't expect HIM to hate me just because i CURSE him. i'm not cursing him for real! it's just my emotions. you know, *girls on period*. plus, i didn't mention his name at all. so, it's not considered as a CURSE. haha.

let's go back to the topic. to be honest, i love reading esther's blog. it's all about life and i love when she said "Without the wrong guys, we would never meet the Mr RIGHT". just from this single sentence, i felt like i've understood the whole thing. the reason why should i've met HIM and another HIM. it seems like i've found my definite answer, so naturally. i know my actual desire now and i've made my own decision. once and for all. so, the whole 'poem' sounds like this. (taken from esther's blog) :)

Without hurt, we would never know the pain,
Without the wrong guys, we would never meet the Mr RIGHT,
Without hardship, we would never know to appreciate...
Without patience, that's not called "True Love"

yeaa, i believe in you esther. we're still young and we should NOT waste our golden time just for these kind of things. humans are created with their own companion. i believe i'll find my true love someday and now, i should focus on my study. especially next year which i will have my form 4 year. it'll be a huge change, a huge difference, just differ than every thing's now. i need to be ready, i don't wanna be a moron again, an idiot who'll be deluded by guys again.

and about my Mr. Right? i think i've found him. maybe he's the right one. and maybe he could be my true love? look, i'm dreaming again. yeah right =.=' . and i realized i'm so so wrong for meeting such a wrong guy, yeaa, my so-called Mr. Wrong. But, as what've esther told me, you'll never find the right one if you haven't meet the wrong one. so, a lot of thanks to my Mr Right and even my Mr Wrong.

so, yeaa, i'm just me and yeaa, i'm original. so, DON't LABEL ME. if you can delude me this way, SO DO I. just get a life and go away from me. you're so stink jerky !

and, a big big thanks to my dearest Esther who'd been the only understanding people. i feel much much better right now and i wish, you too, Esther. thanks Esther :)

your call.

last night...

it was one o'clock in the morning when everyone had gotten themselves into their own fantasy world. it was dark, silent, peace but it's meaningless. it made me feel even more upset, even more irritated. i glanced around my own room, thinking of something that is not defined. thinking about something complicated, more than i've ever had and i just don't know why. i just couldn't close my eyes and maybe this time was, insomnia.

my phone rang and it cracked the peace of night. my mind turns zero in a sudden.

*who would call me in the middle of the night? would it be an emergency?*

so, i just picked it up.

me : hello?

caller : hello. ney nabila ka?

me : eyaa. sepa ney yeaa?

caller : still remember me?

me : ermm? you are...

*i hesitated. that sound is really familiar. is it him?*

caller : it's me, taufiq.
me : oww, yeaa... yes. ermm?

caller : i know you might want to stop this conversation right away but please, give me some chance.

me : chance? what do you mean?

caller : you knew it. me either. i just hope that...

me : we can get back like before?

caller : yeaa. i really hope for it. if you don't mind.

*what do you mean I DON'T MIND? what am i? a loser who was desperate for love?*

me : you knew our past. you're the one who ruined it. you broke my heart and now you're getting me back? what exactly do you want from me? tears???

caller : i...just can't live without you. you're the one who made me laugh and even cry. you made me realized the real love. you made me respect every girls in this world. you're my everything and i'm really sorry for what i've done.

*sorry? will the word 'sorry' heal everything that happened? will it change our past? no! *

me : ....

caller : okei, perhaps you need time. i really wish we can be... you know, like before. cuz i really love you.

*i love you either. love you more than you've ever did.*

me : .... i can't take it anymore. you know how hurt am i when you left me alone? you left me with the tears, you left me without sympathy. you left me with your memories and love ! and now, you're taking me back? as what? as an idiot girl who'll be cheated by guys, again?

caller : stop it ! you do not know how painful i was that time. you didn't even know. you didn't know all this while i'm having miserable days. you didn't even give me some space for explaination.

me : explaination? what else do you want to explain? you have another girlfriend? or you actually didn't love me at all?

caller : i love you more than anything. it's just that...

me : what?

caller : i've to leave you. my mom knew about us. everything. so, i've no choice other than leaving you without any reason. my mom banned me from using phone. i thought you would forget about me.

me : but you hurt me ! i broke down and i felt like the world is no longer alive. i felt so dark. so lonely. ...*i cried*

caller : i...*he seems like crying* ...i need you. i can't take it anymore. i love you...

me : i love you too... *crying*

caller : i need you, yin. i missed you so much and i'm moving next year.

me : you're moving? i don't understand.

caller : yeaa, i'm moving to kk and we'll rarely meet each other again.

me : ermmm. i just don't know. i really need some time. to heal everything.

caller : i know. take your time. and one thing that i want you to know, i love you more than anything. i love you.

me : .....
caller : guess you're really sleepy right now. go bobok okay? fiq sayang sama yin. ermm, jangan buang cincin tuwh yaa yin?

me : ...

caller : yin??

me : yeaa.

caller : okay. bye. goodnight and sweetdreams.

me : goodnight. bye...

it's complicated. i just don't know. should i trust him? what if he cheated me once again? break my heart once again? and leave me alone like what he'd done before?

i...i just don't know. i wish everything will get better in time. nabila, stop thinking such a thing. you have to forget him, not only him, but all of these love stuff. you're just 15 and you shouldn't trap yourself in these kinds of stuff. you have to continue your life. you have to do this. YOU HAVE TO AND YOU CAN DO THIS !

you go girl !

status : jiwank gilakk wehh.
btw, this is my 60th post, congrates me ! yayy ! =.='

stranger.

hah ! what an icky, cozy, yummy, busy, windy, breezy and rainy day. it suppose to be a sunny and perfect day today but it doesn't. and the unusual and unbelievable thing is, I MET A STRANGER TODAY. yes, no kidding.

i still remember the first time i met stranger was the day i was born, that is meeting my mom and dad and not to forget, my doctor and the nurses too. yeaa whatever. =.=' so today i've met one awesome, cool stranger who are not supposed to be called stranger. okei, stop my craps. straight to the point, i've finally met a stranger, who i've known through the net, SHEENA ! it's the second time i met online buddy after jannine.

so, first of all, i really really wanna give this really really sincere apology to my sygs, Sheena for being late for almost an hour. REALLY SORRY SHEENA ! well actually, my mom and dad had some probs which they couldn't avoid and had to solve it on the spot. so, i'm really really sorry SHEENA :)

btw people, i didn't blow her off ! haha. i'm not that mean bhaa. so, once i arrived Sabah Chicken Rice, i was like some kind of freak who just escaped from sepilok, searching for sheena in the crowd. i was like, "my God, i think she had gone mad and walked away angrily cuz i'm soo soo late right now." so, i waited for about 5 minutes in there. sitting alone without taking some order. then i realized i was soo damn fool for waiting her inside. why don't i search for her outside? gosh, i'm really that stupid.

ahha ! sheena ! i saw you ! yes, it was her. my goodness, she's so pretty, gentle and feminine. just a perfect girl, the true and pure girl. *of course she is laa bahhh* i am really really an opposite of her. she's soo feminine while i'm a clumsy lil girl who was always be labeled as a freak by the public. haha. *which i don't really care though* i'm really excited cuz finally i've met my online buddy face-to-face. my goodness ! so, we ate, drink, chat, ate, drink, chat, ate, drink, chat and finally decided to stop eating as both of us lost our appetite. i don't know these days i felt like really really HATE eating. and fortunately, i haven't been declared by the doctor as a Bulimia's patient yet. thank God.

we went around the town and reached Grace Plaza where sheena bought her conditioner while me ended by buying nothing. and yea, it was raining. fine. great =.=' we took a cab and went to the cinema straight away. it was weird, kinda, cuz the cinema looked so so much darker than it supposed to. idk why and then when i saw my uh-so-perasan bro, abg hendra the HELLBOY said BLACK OUT ! FINE. GREAT. it was really a BAD day. everyone was waiting like hell inside and even outside. with no choice, Paloma is the only shop that we can hang around. yeaa, the only shoes shop that was kinda awesome to take a look. and luckily, the power's on when we're on the way to Servay. we went back to the cinema and i gave sheena a surprise which was not looked like a surprise at all, that is a FREE cinema ticket ! haha. it's not that i'm spending her or what but it's a promise from my adopted-bro, abg Hendra. yeaa, i was really happy as he promised to spend me in conjunction of the eid. *like duit raya laa*

about the HORROR movie that i've watched with sheena just now was a total HORROR. trust me, it was that horror till you can scream even louder than the GHOSTS did ! ahahahaha ! that horror story really laugh my ASS out babe ! well, you might be asking, WTF am i talking right? i said it's scary but i laughed? even sheena's laughing. haha. actually, that story was a comedy-horror story. you know what, that story could be a heart-killing story as the horror parts came in, you'll scream out loud but laugh your ass out simultaneously as the fear and hilarious appeared at the same time. *kan sheena? you'll never understand my words since i'm really suck in using adjectives. really. but'but, that movie was such hilarious ! really funny. and yeaa, that movie was a Cantonese movie, called VAMPIRE. you should watch it. HAVE TO. i bet you'll get this weird plus amusing feelings after watching this movie all by yourself. it will definitely kill your miserables and even burst your eardrum as people are screaming like HELL in there. no joke. in short, i gave that movie 6 stars out of 5. *still, i can't help myself stop laughing til now.

after laughing for about 2 hours, we decided to go home. so yeaa, sheena, i'm home :) yeaa, almost forgotten, i met my form 6 peeps. Firman thought Abg Hendra gave me that free tickets because of something. you know. hey Firman ! i'm not that cheap bhaa. he's actually one of my relatives. haiyoo. please don't get him wrong.

well, it's undeniable that i'm talkative and friendly *chehhh* and maybe because of that, i TALK to strangers. *weird kan?* but i'm not that stupid. i know KARATE waaa. but, just don't ask what's my belt. bikin malu orhh. >.<

so overall, i love hanging out with sheena. yeaa, maybe it's the first time we met, so we didn't really have topics to talk about but i believe, we'll get along someday. nice hanging out with you sheena and most of all, you're soo SEXAYY sheena ! ahahaa ! :)

p/s : gtg go now. having party tonight :)

simple and sucks

duh. finally, i've updated my fs. it's been ages i didn't update it. so, i chose retro. AGAIN. i just don't know why am i so into retro and vintage these days. haha. my another drugs. btw, how's my new fs look? nice? colourful ! wat a great compliment =.='

thanks for viewing, do visit my fs :)
click here : my friendster

why don't you just break me up?

huhh. i'm DONE with you. SICK with you. TIRED. EXHAUSTED. why don't you just break me up? just because i'm a girl? because i'm soft-hearted? or it's because you're alone? afraid to be single??

you said you loved me. LOVING SOMEONE IS NOT ABOUT dating someone, text or phone your another-half all the time. LOVING is SHARING. and honestly, you've shared nothing with me except the despairs, miserables and nothing else. there's no happiness at all. it was only sadness between us that i don't wanna get through again. and yeaa, both of us knew bout it.

but why were we so stupid? hiding the truth? and being dishonest to each other? i smiled to you but have you ever knew that i'm crying inside? you said you wanna forget the past. YES, i've done my best to help you but WHY don't you help yourself? maybe she means a lot to you or maybe i am just a NOTHING for you. then WHY SHOULD THIS ATTACHMENT EXIST?

and i just don't understand why should i accept you at the first time? is it because of love or sympathy? and i realize the answer would be SYMPATHY. i'm so sorry. i've tried my best to love you but NO, i can't do that. i wanna be with someone i love, someone i know and you're NOT THE ONE. i'm so sorry for cheating you for almost a month. i can't take it anymore and i hope someday you'll look into my eyes and say to me that you never love me.

listen here, we have to stop cheating. stop all the bull craps. stop all the drama cuz there're too much secrets and lies between us. and the only thing that we can do is BREAK UP and please don't dodge. avoiding something will only makes something to become worse. so, we break up and i'm single. fullstop.

and dear, the only way to forget a girl is TO FIND ANOTHER GIRL. just walk away! find another girl or get back with your exGF or commit suicide or what cuz i don't CARE !

thanks for everything. i don't love you. being friends is more than enough :)

an apology :[

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILADHA
maaf zahir dan batin
especially for the post that i've posted just now :[

another KevJumba ? again ?

NOW THIS IS THE REAL HILARIOUS xD
laugh my ass out people !

these days, i've found my new drugs, that is SNOOPING AROUND THE YOUTUBE FOR IDIOTS VIDEO. haha. really. it's like drug, soo addictive. so yesterday i've said about one comedian called KevJumba right? ahha! you ain't gonna believe this. there's someone who looks much much more like KevJumba. and this time is NOT ANDREW.

i still remember when i saw Kev's face, he looks like one of my school mates. he's form 5 this year and trust me, he's the naughtiest guy ever cuz it's been a year, ME as the prefect for his class, 5 INTAN, took care of his class. and FORTUNATELY, i'm no longer the 5 Intan's victim. fuhhh. thank God.

so now, i wanna tell y'all about the naughtiest guy ever, who is 99% LOOKS LIKE KEVJUMBA, and even ANDREW could be defeated. NO JOKE. *kay, you should take a look.*

so people, prepare for the second KevJumba --- YONG SAU KIRK and his gay partner, DESMOND !! the sm st patrick's students ! and trust me, their videos are what we call the REAL hilarious, could be funnier than KevJumba's vids. hahaha. pleasant viewing :)


title : SPYING FOR IDIOTS


check out his next video. it's funny too. really funny. xD


title : THE SUPERNATURAL



so, how's their videos? doesn't YONG look like kevJumba? goshh, Kev, you just need to look for another 5 out of 7 twins cuz you've found Yong Sau Kirk and Andrew. yeaa, you're soo fortunate.

and people, being alike to someone doesn't mean that we need to be COMPLETELY the same as him or her, right? each and everyone of us are unique and YES we are differ to each other. we have our own talent and even our own trademark. so why should we act like someone we don't recognize? we are what we are and remember, WHAT WE EAT IS WHAT WE ARE. so people, don't eat too much!! haha. or else, you'll be like some kind of SUMO-FIGHTER who can't walk steadily with the FAT all over the body and can't even sit on a single chair ?! my goshh. hahaha xD

my goodness, i think i'm going too far. so, moral of the day, OUR REFLECTIONS IS NOT OUR REALITY. think about it :)

p/s : actually, YONG SAU KIRK had defined himself as KevJumba quite a long time ago =.=' whereas DESMOND defined himself as the Nigahiga =.='

i'm outdated ?

THIS IS HILARIOUS =.='

okei, i was snooping at kay's blog just now and i saw this one funny vid. it's andrew's video if i'm not mistaken. he's an asian, yeaa, having his own vid at the youtube. so, when i was in midst of watching that video, i realised he looked like someone but i was in ALZHEIMER and i don't remember WHO.

but after a while, i saw kay's caption below, ahha! i got it! he looked like KEVJUMBA! and i was a NOT-SO-HUGE fans of his but still a FANs. all i like about him is he's funny, yeaa, quite funny though, and most of all,
I LOVE HIS TOPICS.

well, it's quite a while i didn't snoop around the youtube bout KevJumba and i've been living like a PALEOLITICS people who didn't even know that KevJumba is JUDGING FEMALES AS m'n'ms. WTF?? m'n'ms the CHOCs CANDY?

okei, watch this video and see how MEAN he is! hahaha. just kidding. ROFL. whatever. just watch this vid. =.='



p/s : malaysia's line is ten times WORST than other countries. but still, you have to watch this video till the end. desperate. for the FEMALEs' sake =.='

and people, if you don't regconize who the earth KevJumba is, check up the youtube and you'll see his awesome videos, kinda, hihi.

as i'm not one of the youtube's users, so i can't give him a comment cuz i'm just not one of the users. am i repeating? oww.nvm, so, he was like a GUY who disagreed to have RACISTS BABIES. yeaa, me too. how could the people on earth change their lifestyle, culture, and even SKINTONE? *i'm not a racist here but think positive, you can't expect people to have their livings to be the same ten years after, right?

so, in this case, i agreed with Kev. but kev, girls are labeled as CANDY or CHOCS or whatever it is, which i STRONGLY disagreed with, is just not RIGHT to me. just not right. okei, i'm not ANTI-ing you here, but please, don't take FEMALEs issues as JOKES. it's NOT FUNNY. =.='

whatever things i've expressed here are JUST MY EMOTIONS. *girls on period*. plus, Kev ain't gonna read my blog. will he? so people, get a life and DO WATCH Kev's videos cuz it will definitely kill your boredom. trust me :)

photosnaping :)

ulalaa people!
people always says a picture paints a thousand words :)
so today's post is all about pics pics pics!
okei, i was once told by one of my blog friends that my blog is LACK OF PICTURES. ahha! is that true?

so today, gonna present y'all, THE ONE AND ONLY POST, FULL OF PICTURES * it's not that much anyway *
but at least, i'm trying my best to satisfy my COMPLAINER. haha ;p

so, yesterday, i went to TAWAU's HOT SPRING. guess not everyone of you know this place. well, this place is just a stone's throw away from my house. and for further infomation, check up the dictionary or see through the map or ask your dad or what cuz i DON't CARE !

i took some photo and please don't complain my pics cuz now i'm just learning how to become a professional photographer. i wanna be like RIDHO, KATRINA, SYAKILA, :) cuz you know what, the pics they've captured is DAMN FCKING A BIZZARE! my goodness, i adored them! and you know what, a common place that you always see turns into a FREAKING BEAUTIFUL SCENERY ever! they are that GREAT. trust me.

so now, let me present my hard work. just click on the pics to see it clearly :)


this is the first pic i've taken once we arrived there :)




ahha! that's my car, i mean my dad's car. YELLOW-mellow :))
this is my FAV PICTURE ^,^




i don't know who the hell he is but for sure that's the HOT SPRING that i've mentioned just now :)




that's my naughty sista who was trying to take a bath there! haha :D




so, this is the whole scenery of the HOT SPRING. nice waaa :D


well, kinda dissapointed cuz the one and only hot spring in tawau was taken granted by the tawau people and even the government. as you can see in the pictures, GARBAGE and DIRTS are all over it. i'm soo dissapointed. really hope they'll have some awareness on the self-hygine and even the cleanliness of the nature. hope soo :)

so after that, we went tooo ---


tadaa! SIN ONN TIKU! here's the prove.





this is where thay put their stuff i guess :))





haha. do see the goats! ahha! my bestiesss! KAMBENGSSS!! xD






this is the place where we went to after sin onn tiku.
it's like a village laa.





so, we stopped by to buy somoething. KUIH SEPIT !! tadaaaa!



before we reached home, we visited a renovating HUGE HOUSE in taman megah jaya. omg! that house was really BIG and you know what, the owner owns 7 cages, like kennel, but it's bigger, only for his 7 dogs. i repeat, 7 DOGSS ! my goodness, WTH? 7 dogs? guess he wants to make his house sooo sooo safe with the presence of DOGsss and even SECURITY GUARD. but'but, i love that house cuz it looks like an INDONESIAN house and it's UNIQUE ! u've got to take a look or even a visit! cuz the owner hasn't move yet. hihihihi. but people, i captured a feww pics cuz there's some security guard around and i don't want him to SCOLD me of course. so, pleasant view :)




this is the twilight view. SUPERB MANN !






this is part of his park. cooooooool :)


so, how's my pics? that's all i got. i deleted some of the photo cuz they are really look like JERK. haha. so how? look at them and rate them! leave some comments on my tagboard. COMPLAINs and COMPLIMENTs are welcome!

thanks for viewing. love u!!

random update =.='

THIS GIRL is having some prob with her online-hour
she was GROUNDED and she's not allowed online at nights.

HER bro just got back from kaykay.
HER house was a mess
HER room was 'neater'
and'and having some date on the 6th.
wish HER LUCK !

p/s : i don't even know WTH am i posting these days.

don't ever trust me guys. the word 'grounded' actually means i'm not going anywhere for my own reason, not parents laa. cuz i'm soo SKINT now.
no money no life =.='

and to my phone spammer, i've deleted all your sms dear.
you're sucks ! LMAO ! get a life ! GTFO !

1-2-3-4 !

i love this song. you should take a break and listen :)

1-2-1-2-3-4
Give me more loving than I’ve ever had
Make me feel better when I’m feeling sad
Tell me I’m special even though I know I’m not

Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Barely getting mad
I’m so glad I found you
I love being around you

You make it easy
Its as easy as 1-2-1-2-3-4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you

There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you

Give me more loving from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things you never even tell your closest friends

Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
You’re the best that I’ve had
And I’m so glad I found you
I love being around you

You make it easy
It’s easy as 1-2-1-2-3-4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you

There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you
(I love you) I love you

You make it easy
It’s easy as 1 2 1 2 3 4
There’s only one thing
To Do
Three words
For you
(I love you) I love you

There’s only one way to say
Those three words
That’s what I’ll do
(I love you) I love you
(I love you) I love you
1-2-3-4
I love you
(I love you) I love you


p/s : i love you soo much dear :))

the real boredom

how's this pic?
boredom really can make one to become insane like THIS. no joke.


buhh. boring nyaa.
buhh, sukak hati laaa.
buhh, no credit buhh.
sorry dianne, sis dyan, faz, syamil, muzz, yvonne and a STRANGER.
haiyoo. ada spammer d phone sudaa.
btw, sorry laa people,
credit abeshh !
can't reply your msg people !

p/s : nda taw laa. sukak ckp 'buhh' sudaa ney. gilak sudaa :)



in a sudden, thought of twilight.
really wanna watch this.
and the book, i haven't get it.
goshh, i'm desperate with the book.

and'and, good night people ! :)

gonna miss my Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart :((

TWILIGHT DESPERATE ! ! ! !

in love?

soo in ♥












hello people !
i'm kinda LAZY updating my blog recently.
just wanna say a few words here.

goshh, just now i attended my realtive's wedding and it was TOTALLY awesome! it's not that i'm interested in these weddings thingy but haha, u ain't gonna believe what happen just now! goshh, i'm SOO in lovee ♥ ♥ ♥ . tadaaaa!

i met my first LOVE ! i mean my FIRST crush. no joke.

it's been 4 years we didn't meet each other and it was like POOF i saw HIM back!! he's taller and of course more handsome. haha. i was soo crushed on him since i was in primary 5. haha, kinda funny cuz i meet him again and YES this time is NO MORE CRUSH.

WE ATTACHED ! lolz, kidding. we just exchanged our phone number since he was studying in KK right now. and fyi, he's 17. same age with my bro. he's Uncle Sobrie's son and about his name, i'll tell y'all later after some 'improvement'. if you get what i mean. haha xD

goshh, and of course NOT i'm the one who flirted him. gentleman laa buhh, he did that. just act cool as my BROTHER WAS THERE. but he's nice. idk. whatever. i'm SINGLE and YES i can do whatever things i wanted right? and, same goes to him ! don't get JEALOUS people ! ! hihihi :)

breakaway :D

T H E O N L Y W A Y :)

finally, today i've made my OWN decision. i wanna stop everything. i don't care anymore bout relationship! bye LOSER! why should i be such a fool for being such a dumb to such a LOSER guy? such an IDIOT ! so now, i'm planning to be single. once again, YES i am ! single-mingle !! my plan is, i wanna DUMP him first before he dump me ! bye bye loser ! muahahha. *evill laugh* for guys out there, please don't flirt me. i don't have any mood to entertain y'all. omg, sounds like whores. no, i mean i've no time for these kinda ATTACHMENT THINGY. understand?

so, i've a great holiday this time. really great suckishh!!! went to sandakan and kk. tomorrow, my mom's going back to her second hometown. SANDAKAN. i'm not going back there ! never and ever. such a boring life living there without INTERNET ! plus, i'm having meet-up aka GURLS DAY-OUT with SHEENA !! can't wait. fyi, we're attacking GUARDIAN which we'll have our FREE make up lessons. hahahah xD *kan sheena. so sheena, be well prepared, cuz u'll meet the craziest ppl ever! and'and sheena, i'll bring my HUGE handbag too. just hoping tat i won't be some BULKY MACEK2 laa. hahaha xD

so, that's bout sheena. my new great friend. she's cool. wanna take a look at her?



cute right? i love her smile. gorgeous. jeleshh orhh. hihi. nywy, can't wait to meet u hunn ! i like her words --- GET A LIFE ! and'and, you know what, both of us got chemistry cuz both of us hate bitches. i guess everyone does. =.= but she's different, she told me abt one RETARDED, kesian friend, which is her hater now, acting like some WHORES, i mean sluts, saying bad things bout her. and surprisingly, sheena posted about the bitch into her blog! such a brave of her ! i like her style! that's our own right kan sheena? it was called MY BLOG for reasons ! buduh bha org tuwh sheena.

you see, we're soo famous. haha. fame comes just like that once bitches mention your name. they named it. all over the school and I , the one who had known as MEAN, *kununnya, had become famous and even well-known ! haiyaa, these whores are just wasting their time and SALIVA for doing such useless things. GET A LIFE laa anjing betina aka BITCHES !

i have my own life and my own rights.

this is MY blog. all rights reserved and you have no right AT ALL! you know what, idiots are always dumb and dumber will always be dumped ! don't you think so? so, to my one and only hater, change your attitude and come'on laa, you're NOT FAMOUS laa. stop dreaming BITCH!

p/s: sheena really makes me reminisce the past where i was retarded by some bitches and now my hater is the one who was retarded. kasiann. no friends sudah dya. even her own friends have no trust on her, pa lagi her enemies? begokkk laa kaw snaa . xp

will post something later. hope soo. :)

miserable :((

once you hear this song,

u'll know how UPSET am i this time.

i'm real JERK.

i'm USELESS.

am i just a NOTHING for ya?

i just don't know.

if i could just go back to the past

and start everything all over again.

i wish this relationship never exists.

YES i mean it.

i just don't know. :[[

still, i'm in confusion =/

i just don't know :[

WHERE I STOOD

by Missy Higgins

I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's all or none
There were sounds in my head
A little voice is whispering
That I should go and this should end
Oh and I found my self listening

'Cause I don't know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cause she will love you more then I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

See I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you aren't leaving without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside

'Cause I don't know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cause she will love you more then I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call
You meant more to me then any one I've ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself
And so I say to you, this is what I have to do.

'Cause I don't know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cause she will love you more then I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
She who dares to stand where I stood.

confusion.

C O N F U S I O N

i just don't know :(

okei. it was damn boring now. sheena is not on the line anymore, leaving me alone with my pc and of course a few more craps out thre. well, i'm back tawau people ! but i feel NO EXCITEMENT at all except the fact that i can online again. no, it's a FINALLY. yea, i'm an internet addict and i can't survive without internet. i was barely alive at sandakan but when i'm back, i felt the same too. my life was loveless. and perhaps me too :(

ermm, i'm not in the mood now talking bout my trip to sandakan n kk. so, just let me tell y'all a lil story of mine during this hols.

so last week, i was attached to some guy but til now, i'm not sure with this attachment. yea, most of u must hve been saying: "don't take too serious to these kind of relationships. u're still young." yea2, i know that. i'm not taking serious hundred percently but i just don't understand this relationship. i mean everything. what's the point of attaching this time? i just don't know. i'm in confusion that i couldn't even explain how does my heart feels right now. i feel like i couldn't trust guy anymore and i couldn't even give other guy some chances. i was reall hurt last time and i don't want it to happen again. never.

yea, i can't blame him for being COLD to me cuz ME, did the same thing to him too. before we attached, everything was soo sweet but after having relationship, everything changed. i mean it had become worse. i just don't understand all of it :(

why can't i forget the past? only GOD knows what's the trauma i've been through before. i'm sick of everything. everything!! and i really wish this relationship never exists. i didn't mean to hurt him but i just don't want to be hurt again.

maybe i need some time. think about it all over again and hopefully will find a DEFINITE ANSWER. please show me the right path. :[

i'm so confused . . .

thanks a lot !!

♥ i still have one tag to go . but gtg now . going to shopping ! i'm trying my best peeps ! thanks a lot for d tag . i love y'all !

kiss goodbye

gonna miss my TAWAU !

♥ bubu :(

happy midnight peeps ! i'm soo soo not in the mood now. being forced by my mom to spend my two weeks time in sandakan really irritates me. yeaa, it is undeniable that sandakan is much2 better than tawau, but'but u can't expect me to SURVIVE there for 2 weeks ! plus, living without my friends ? yea2, i'm dying~ -.-

however, i've got to look at the positive sides too. at least, living there give me some peace. yeaa, once again, NO WAR KNOW PEACE *my new tm* . i loveee Obama!! okei dokei. another benefit, i'm going to live with my mom. yeaa, that means i'll have the best meal ever, if compared to the living with my dad. but of course, i'm gonna miss my dad. absolutely.. he's the only person who can stand with my keep-changing-mood. frankly, i'm a moody person who would slam anything if i'm JUST NOT IN THE MOOD. so, be prepared.. xD ermmm, haven't think about another benefit yet. yea2 ! i remembered ! i can meet my exBFs there ! my ORANG UTAN ! hahaha~ miss them soo soo much :)

bout my trip to sandakan. no no . i mean my SURVIVAL in sandakan, i'll be there tomorrow, i mean today, on the 10th. and it was a 5-hour-drive and i'll surely have my carsick. again ? goshh, i hate carsick. so, my plan in sandakan ---

1 . wanna me meet my exBFs xD
2 . wanna learn add math with my cuzies .
3 . wanna go to GIANT .
4 . wanna have some peace !
5 . finish my SHIT book .

yea2, wanna tell y'all something. i was really shocked when i found a book entitled 'SHIT' in my dad's drawer. that book was real awesome and it tells every single little thing bout RUDE WORDS. can u imagine that? plus, it tells you how to use it properly and it didn't mean rude at all. for further information, wait till i finished the book. and'and, last saturday, i watched a movie named MAYX PAYNE *i'm not sure with the spelling* , and it was the worst movie ever. it tells about angel thingy and suddenly tells about some drug which makes one to become stronger. so what's the purpose of the appearence of angel ? still, i don't understand the story. :(

lastly, wanna say, goodbye tawau and here i come SANDAKAN !!

freedom.

barrack obama d next president of US !
♥ happy holiday ..

ulaalaa ! hello peeps ! morningg ! really happy today to know Barrack Obama had bcome the next president for United State of America . hope the world will bcome PEACE again , after the ruling of BUSH is over . frankly, i don't like bush at all . how dare am i to talk such a thing in public like this . well, that's my right nywy . so , bout Obama , i support him 100% and really hope he'll change the world .yeaa , NO WAR KNOW PEACE !

so , today is the first day of holiday . yesterday was like OMG next year i'll be in sweet 16 and i'll be no longer 15 . i'm growing older and the time pasts soo fast . it seems like just yesterday i was in form 1 where everything starts from zero . but now, i'm a 15-year-old teenager who is waiting for PMR results . my current doom now .

so, this holiday will be fun . i guess . cuz i'm going to meet my new friend, eva ! hope soo. and'and, most of all, i'm gonna be in Sandakan which i'll have a meet up with my old'old friend, FATIN LYANA . i bet it'll be a blast !! bsides sandakan, i think i'm going to kay2 , looking forward to c myraa ! my coconut ! tee hee :) but i don't think i'm gonna meet my exBF there . he's sucks and i wish i'll never meet him again. never .

overall, i got so much plans for this holiday and i wish i'll use up all my free time wisely . tadaaa :) i'm done ! so, this is d latest pic which i just edited just now .i look soo idiot in this pic . and'and , gonna miss my sanggari cuz she's moving next year and yesterday was d last day we met ! imy , sanggari !!!



p/s : from left -- sanggari , valerie , and silly ME .

happy deepavali !
♥ to all Indians ..

yepedi yire kingge ? nanale irke . hahax . tamil opening ! wahahaha . nan unnai kadelikeren ! dat's wat my MIC's friends taught me . useful huh ? so , hello busybodies ! i've a really tiring day today which is a whole day of servicing musical instruments ! it suppose to be a happening holiday for me today but to my disappointment , all my plans had to be canceled last minute just for brass band . LOYAL brass band member , huh ? *sigh* .

so today , once again , we , BRASS BAND presented the school for some sports day , it's a family day i guess . and then , around 8 , we finished but not for e and the other AJKs . we've to stay til evening, around 5pm , to service our instruments . sound cool but it wasn't . not at all . i prefer taking care babies but not this ! for instruments like clarinet, flute, saxophone, xylophone, simba, n drum set, we need not to wash them . just polish it a bit and it's done .

but, some instruments need lots of work . namely trumpet, trombone, euphonium, horn and many more . thy're really ABUSING me with the dust and BACTERIA all over it . but washing them is kinda fun . yea , really , especially when we played the water and splashed it over to each other , it really makes me reminisce the past . the past where i used to WASTE the water in front of the house with the NAKED me . oww plz stop it . so, look how childish we are .


i love the water splashing out .


do u see the disgusting brush ?


this is what we call trombone in NAKED .


thy're real busy with work and me kept capturing pictures .


i really enjoyed myself playing with the splashes until my stomach started to whisper that i'm totally hungry . fyi, besides get 'abused' by the instruments , we also had to eat in an ABUSED way . this is the EVIDENCES ---


my lunch ~


as u can see here , we are STARVING .


to feel up our time with useful stuff , we'd also taken some idiot photos which is absolutely UGLY . so just close my blog if it's too ugly .

that's how i live my life today . yea2 , forget to tell u, i went to one indian's open house today and the curry was EXTREMELY superb ! and the kebab , i can't even dare to eat it ! it was that special and i just don't even wanna touch it . u wanna noe why ? cuz it's too BIG . and i dont think i can swallow it . so, i prefer chicken rice more . hee ^.^ so, that's all for tonight . tata titit tututtt .

raya at school !

♥ school's eid !
ohha ! great day today ! whatchaaa ! actually, my school had just celebrated our annual hari raya party which was held just now . like years before, we're allowed to wear raya outfit . wahahahaha . evryone was happy with dat except those who don hve raya costume cuz they had to wear back that white blue outfit . u know laa . so today, kinda busy handling the class plus the laziness and the passiveness of our class , i'm extremely exhausted . first of all, wanna thank my dad cuz he's willing to sponsor our food . cheers ! =) & thanks too to my great great friends , for giving such a helpful hands , except those who din help me at all . well , just forgive them . it's still eid . we'd taken lots of pictures . being crazy is really FUN plus the freedom we had now , i'm really out of my mind just now .

gotta see this . limited edition



so, today i had become a HOT HOT SOT celebrity ! hihi~ at first, evryone re starving like HELL mann since the canteen is not opened ?! and, we're only allowed to start our party after recess ??!!! what the f*ck ?!! and finally, my dad came with d food , and evryone was attacking the food like thy never ever eat mann . okay , i'm gotta complain this to the school authority . yes , i won't . hihi~ then evryone consume the food SAFELY as thre's NO MELAMINE contained . okey, dijamin HALAL . few minutes later . . .


plates n cups with SALIVA .. eww .


where's my curry ?!! thy gonna pay for this !


HELL . they just know how to eat but not to wash . yeah , they left EVERYTHING to us . fortunately, i got few understanding friends which help me at the end . LUCKILY . due to the duty we had , i mean as a DISHWASHER , we missed the announcements . til now i din know what the hell does it says . well nvm , at least , i enjoyed my career as part-time dishwasher now . yeah right . still , i hate those who din help me AT ALL . taw2 laa sndri ...

my pinky winky baju kurung was wet and i had to attend another meeting after dishwashening . terrible life huh ? so, that's how i live for today . yea2, my mom and dad had gone to KK while i was alone at house with my cuzie and sista . and yeashh !! i'm gonna be FREE for one and a half day without hearing BABBLE all around my ears !! thank God .

specially dedicated to someone

sort of upset ...

i felt like i wanna cry this time . first of all, i didn't go anywhere today . juz hanging out with my mom n dad , n my PC at home .

story of the day ---
one of my friends . she was upset due to some reasons . she was really sad bout the things happened around her . i'm trying my best to help her too . just hoping she'll be fine . she's having insomnia bcuz of her probs .


just for u, my friend ...
well, worrying bout someone really makes u uncomfortable, but do take care of urself . don't be too upset . be realistic and face the probs with courage . i bet u can go through all these . trust me, she'll be fine as i can c her determination deep in it . she's trying her best . supports and care do help . all we can do now is pray for her and mostly take care of urself . sure ur BF din want to c u're sick too right ? trust me, he really needs u now . take care of urself cuz all he wanted is ur supports and care . don't worry, i'll always pray for her n u too . do take care of urself ! hope u're seeing this .



best of wishes .
nabila
antihomo
like u always say
u have me by ur side dear ...

♥ penat gilakk !

hari ney penat gilakk ehh ! what a tiring day ! for the whole day i spent my time with the school brass band . morning, i left my house . go to the school and practice with my instrument . wukey, it's BOOORINGGG .. then after that, take around ten minutes for break . we just eat bread .. but i'm so grateful cuz it's CHOCOLATE ! hihi . after break, we changed to full uniform at the toilet . i mean the school toilet !! goshh, i'm out of it.. then we're scolded by teacher for taking sooo long changing clothes.. the bus came before we finished changing . moral of the day --- BE PUNCTUAL

then, we went to komplex sukan . there, ppl re looking at me like HELL mann.. hello ??!! don't u ever saw ppl wearing skirt ? wokey, our outfit is a common uniform and a really really CUTE skirt .

back to the topic . they seems like they NEVER saw ppl wearing skirt ! well , watever, as long as i'm happy with that . i love the way i am . don ever judge me . u're saying i'm bad but u're worse . so what if u're perfect ? so what if u're pretty ? it's none of my business nyway . so, don't talk to me if u hate me . NONSENSE .

so, we had a lot of fun instead . really.. since the day i became vice president, i'm happy to become one of them . perhaps i'll move next year, but at least let me have some fun with them . we're talking crapss .. finishing our time talking bout the teachersss ... hehehehe .. we're that BAD . really ..could become worse than that . or even WORST . but after PMR, everyone re much much happier .. i feel drowsy now . better go to sleep~

gtg~
good night .
love me .

PMR is over !!!!

♥ freedom at last !

right after we finished our last paper --- geography , I felt like I was flying on the sky ! finally PMR comes to an end . gosh, i nvr felt this way . now then i understand what freedom is all about ! PMR is over n it's time turn over a new leaf . next year, i'm one year older, n i'll be more matured than today . can't wait for sweet 16 . but of course , have to get my PMR results first . for 3 years struggling for PMR, five days last just like that . but , it's worthy mann . for so long i've been waiting, n i finally pass through this difficulty . now, just wanna know my results .

well, overall PMR is quite challenging . especially, CHINESE . it’s extremely hard babe !

BAHASA MALAYSIA --- this subject is rather challenging but fortunately, it’s not as hard as trial I think . and the paper 2 is good laa . no comment .

BAHASA INGGERIS --- it’s moderate . didn’t dare to say EASY . but sometimes, I do think it’s easy, if u compare with Singapore’s level . however, don’t be too confident . whatever it is, I’m satisfied enough with my English .

BAHASA CINA --- OMG . this is d hardest !!! just pray to God so I can get A for this subject . principal is hoping me to get straight 9As including this tough subject . I’m gonna die this time .

AGAMA ISLAM --- thank GOD ! Saidina Ali had become the question of the year ! hihi . thank GOD it’s not as hard as I think . but honestly , the invigilator for this subject is soo handsome . but fortunately, I still can concentrate on my exam . hahax .

MATH --- math ? it’s 100 times easier than our trial mann . hope I can get A for this .

SCIENCE --- nothing special . just like usual though . the paper 2 is quite challenging cuz it requires thinking . need lots of explanation . haizz .

SEJARAH --- me n my friends checked the answer for this subject n MAYBE I’ll get about 8 errors something . plz don’t be more than that . I forced myself to study this subject n it’ll be a waste if I didn’t get A for this . I’m out of my mind …

GEOGRAFI --- quite confusing but overall it’s OK . my teacher also checked this for me n to my surprise, I only get 5 errors ! hope it’s the real results mann.. I’ve studied so hard for this subject n I really hope for A .

KEMAHIRAN HIDUP --- I was so LUCKY to take ERT ! for three years I kept complaining this subject . but now, I really wanna thank the examiner for giving such beautiful questions ! thank GOD … I think I can do well in this subject . hope soo .

9 subjects . huh . 5 days . finally comes to an end . so, my PLAN after this ---

1. I wanna sleep 8 hours per day cuz I never had a sleep like that before this !!!
2. I wanna online 24hours n enjoy chatting with my friends .
3. I wanna get a new BF . hahax . just kidding .
4. I wanna get a new handphone ! but after I get my results of course .
5. I wanna rest on PEACE . not mati laa . just wanna have some peace . in innisfree I guess . hihi ^.^
6. I wanna be friend with my ENEMY ! hope soo . yeah right .
7. &, I wanna sleep with my mom n dad , cuz it’s been 3 years I didn’t sleep with them !!! hihi ^.^


That’s my DESPERATE seven plans . I got a lot more . but let me think of it first .


Well, gtg .
Wanna have some peace in my rest .
Ahax . just kidding LOL .
Good night n sweetdreams !

big big open house ! haizz .

cute cake . isn't it ?

what a tiring day !
terorists are attacking my house !

gosh . i'm extremely exhausted today ! but at least , i enjoyed my whole day of being a SLAVE . ahax . juz kidding LOL . well, my old friend, from my former school, she came to my house . n now she's studying in another school . she's awesome mannn ! i mean, she's sporting and both of us re talking craps mann . she was like OMG it's been a long tym we didn't meet each other n we really had a great time together ! reallyyy . physically, she's pretty n cute ! n mentally, i think she's mentally disorder . juz kidding LOL . she's as crazy as me mannn . she didn't change at all . no and never . i really hope she'll be d same her forever but of course be matured as she grows older . yeah . we're friends since we're in primary school . we used to sit together last time n we enjoyed evry moment we're together . we eat, laugh, and sleep together . ahax . only at school [ will never do more than dat ]. don't we look like a PIG ? .yes we are . she loves PIG . hihi ^,^ . but NOT me . never .

wukey, stop praising her . despite of her "goodness" , she's d worst girl ever ! hihi ^,^

she's d craziest girl ever ! she's talkative . n, she's an UNLOYAL girl . don't ever trust her ! hihi . n d most important thing is --- she got lots of boyfriends . i mean XBFs . 7 i think . within 2 years ? u've got to b kidding but YES she did ! her BF who last longest is one and a half year while d shortest period of attaching together is less than 24 hours . i guess . she's out of her mind, but yeah, she's pretty n it's normal if she can get BF juz like dat ! n now, she's madly in love with one of my classmate . hahax . yeah2, her currently BF --- st**** c**n . hihi . guess it's not a secret nymore .

talking bout her dis much, did i mention her name yet ? wukey, her name --- OLIVIA . nice name huh ? but really, she's a BAD girl . hihi . nvm . she's not going to kick my ass nywy . unless she found my blog =P

yeah2, my open house today ? gosh, i had a great time with my bro's friends n my cuzies . my friends ? they dumped me ! no laaa . i didn't invite them at all, except some of them . actually, i'm doing it purposely cuz for my friends, i will hve another PARTY for them after PMR . nice, isn't it ? right after the PMR is over . 17th of October i think . hope thy'll understand .

overall, i enjoyed my whole day of being part-time waitress . it was fun ! yeah2, me n rebecca re talking shits too . with olivia n faz . they're crazy . miss them sooo much ! i really wanna say sorry to faz, cuz i didn't entertain her much today . u know ... after meeting old friend , there's a lot to say ! sorry faz . i have to . this is the only time we meet each other . n thx too cuz faz n bec re trying their best to fit into our conversation . thx darlas . muaackkkxxx .

what a great day !
hope for a better tomorrow .
nyt2 n sweet dreams .

Selamat Hari Raya !

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI
maaf zahir dan batin!

p/s : hve no time updating my blog .

sweet couple !

SWEET COUPLE !
u have to read this !

gosh . i've done a real big DEED today ! ahax ! 1st of all, wanna tell y'all, i'm hving sore throat now n i feel really UNCOMFORTABLE . wukey, back to d story, i'm really happy cuz i'hve just dne a good deed . evrything starts dis way --- my besty ... i guess u knew it ... she's hving a real complicated situation just now . her bf, aka my fren had a quarrel wit her . actually, it's not a quarrel juz misunderstanding . thy're jelousing on each other . n me ? i'm d HERO ! ahax .

at first, thy don't know wat's their real prob . after analysing d whole story, i started my mission . ahax . first, my besty called me . she told me evrything . then, i know d prob but still ... in a blur situation . then, i sms her bf ... he thought i din know anything but apparently i did ! n he confessed evrything to me . gosh . i love knowing secrets . ahax !

at dat particular moment, i'm juz wanna help them . thy love each other but thy juz can't understand each other . complicated ryt ? so, i'm trying to fit into d situation . so, i'm d judge . i'm not siding anyone in dis case . juz wanna advise them . as a friend .

upon all my words ... i mean my advising words .. i love dis d most

u hve to understand, loving ppl is not only love her fully but also trust her..fit into d situation, ask her, n confess evrything all by ur self ...

goshh . i love my words . jiwang beb !

a couple of minutes later, d guy admit evrything to her . at last , thy live happily ever after . so sweet .

honestly, thy're real swit couple n shouldn't break up . she's my besty n i don't want her to be sad . thy're juz too swit that i couldn't let them b far apart from each other . whatever it is...thy're getting back together . hope thy'll b forever dis way . love them !

maybe u'll say i'm bzbody n YES i do ! i love my frens n i'll lend them my hand whenever they need my help .

a friend's in need is a friend indeed .
that's d moral value of today . ahax .

apa sal aq jiwang semacam hari ney ???
muahahaha . OVERDOS mungkin . or mgkn aq rindu dya
whatever larh . hihi .


nyt2 n switdrims .
may u n ur bf will b forever in love .

freedom at last !

p/s : i lurve dis pic .

yahoooooooo ! freedom at last !

actually , it's just one day of holiday . but it's gud enough for me . at least, i can njoy tonite --- blogging . chat wit my frens . forget about homework mostly . hahax . but it seems lyk i'm missing somthing . oww yeah ! rplying evryone's testi in fs . honestly, i'm bored with dat stupid fs . now then i realized y am i so stupid n cupid when d first tym i played dat idiot fs ? i'm so obsessed to dat thingy till i forget to hve my meal . now , as a result , i can't gain some weight ! nooooooo ! i wanna b fatter a bit . maybe u'll think i'm out of my mind cz wanna b fat ... but d point is i'm too skinny now ! am i ?

wukey . whatever . n tday, i looked into d mirror ... n i realised something juz ain't right with me. somthing is juz NOT RIGHT . goshh ... my 1cm length n 1cm width aka 1cm square pimple had GONE yay ! gosh . i hate it cz it's a CREATURE living on my face without my permission aka trespasser! bsides, it's a parasitism ! it's irritating . but sometyms i do miss my pimples . but, pimple is just not in my wish list . no way !

yeah2 . 4got to tel ya . i have a totally 100 percent insane NEW FREN , juz lyk me . hahax . i juz knew her . i lyk her attitude . i mean her madness . hahax . myaa, don't b mad cz i'm saying bout u hahax . wanna c how SOWT she is ? just click on my LOVE list . p/s : i'm not lesbi .

plus, she oredi had BF .

talking bout bf, thank god i finally get back together with him . i mean get back lyk normal . it's all my fault n his friend's fault . well, don wanna say more than dat . only my besties knew it . biarlah rahsia .. e'eleh, actually it's not a big matter ... juz d matter of jealousy .

happy too to say dat our group got no. 2 in choir competition . gosh, we sang so bad lyk katak n still can get d 1st runner up ??!! hahax . d werld is goin nuts .


i guess i'm talking too much for today . i guess it's bcuz of tommorrow's holiday . hahax . once again, happy holiday !!!!!!

my plan tomorrow --- wanna sleep til NOON after hving my sahur n prayer !!!
p/s : i DESPERATELY need rest .


so, gtg . my mom is calling me to bed . again, happy holiday !!!!!!!!!!
in conjunction of Malaysia's Independence Day, specifically d formation of Malaysia, n deeply d combination of Sabah , Sarawak n Malaya, we'll hve a GREAT HOLIDAY TOMMORROW !!!!!!!

muahahhaha .
nyt2 n swidrims .

a really bad day !

UPDATED MY BLOG

wukey . i juz finish my breakfast actually aka sahur . specifically, i finished it at 4.01am . ok, i'm fasting now . it's been a long time i didn't open this blog . i'm really sorry for my bad behaviour . i guess . huhu . actually , i hve nothing much to say . just wanna update it . juz wanna fulfill my friend's request

another 2 weeks to HARI RAYA !
OMG ! there're just a few more days to PMR . now, i had to brush up with my study . having a really bad day . study , eat and sleep . what can i do ? it's a faith for me . just wish i can get rid of all these things ASAP . i'm exhausted . tired of all these things . God ... help me . i really wish to be a NORMAL person . just like anyone else . i wanna be free ! but, whatever it is, i know . one day, i'll get out of this situation . i will . but after PMR of course after 17th of October .

wukey . dat's bout me recently . my relationship doesn't really work so well these days . i don't know why . it seems like i wanna break with him . i think it's my fault . btw, he's having SPM and i don wanna ruin his whole life . well, just wish him luck . n wish my relationship will last longer . honestly, i haven't find my true lurve yet cehhhhwahhh ... but , he's d best among d others . just wish he could . being far away form him really make me sick . really . just wish he didn't do humilating things out there ---- cheating me ! i'll kick his ASS !

wukey . i nearly fail my relationship . whatever . we'll last longer if i can stand it . but if not, just break sajak larh .

just wish he didn't see this .

wukey . bout my trial exam . SUCKS ! i hate my BM . i read so much but still cannot get high marks ! that teacher is really ... i don wanna say dat . bulan puasa bha ney ... she's too ... i don't know . maybe i'm a malay so she didn't give me high marks . whatever it is . i din mad anymore . besides, the one who corrects my paper in PMR is not her . so, why should i care ? whatever . maybe she doesn't want me to be the top again . she doesn't want me to be in the top 5 again . so, it's up to her . dya yg dpt dosa sak kan ... lantak larh ! but overall , i still din satisfy with my whole exam ! the subjects that i put a lot of effort are real SUCKS . but for the subjects i didn't care much, score perfectly . it really doesn't make sense . am i dreaming now ? my exam was really sucks . perhaps, i can't maintain my position in class anymore . but whatever . as long as i do well in PMR . hope so .

dat's the end of my story . i really2 have a bad day . please ... i'm sick of it . everything is just going upside down . i hate this to be happen . but, i'm still fortunate to have a wonderful family . thx mom n dad . lurve u all .

gtg . have to crack my mind . AGAIN . having tuition continuously for 4 hours today ! whatever . dat's how my life turns . okay, i speak a lot today . bazir air liur sajak waste of saliva .