we're so lucky, batch 93

warning: the following post may seem to be a racial slur but keep in mind the writer is a malay, therefore there is no racial bs in this. furthermore, the writer would like to apologize on any damage inflicted by the following. everyone is entitled for their opinion and the writer has hers. freedom of speech is practiced in Malaysia. viewer discretion is advised :)



guess most of us are well aware of this. but if you don't, kindly check it here:
1. PSD scholarships to be reviewed next year or
2. PM: Total review of PSD scholarship policy in 2012 :)

earlier this month, i was shocked and i believe most of us were, as well since we're informed that students with top results didn't get PILN that they deserve to get despite the vow made by pm that all students scoring 8A+ and above will receive the PSD scholarships. some of them even ended up getting matrix and diploma to study in local.

i am not a straight A+ student in the first place but alhamdulillah, i got PILN. i was excited at the beginning but as time passes, i felt guilty. i thought that i didn't deserve to get it.

so last night i had a short yet thoughtful conversation with a friend of mine, Afiq who is pursuing his studies in UTM Skudai under MARA's Excellence Scheme Program (SPC). yes, he was offered a fast track engineering course even before spm result was announced. he's one of our top spm scorers in my former school and i must admit, he's indeed a potential student. he decided to stay on track, "even if most of your friends are studying abroad?", i asked.

"this is already a blessing. who knows that i may pursue my master abroad?" - he replied.

that very sentence itself had made me thought.

"do i deserve this?" - i doubted.
i didn't feel as ecstatic as i expected myself to be. yes of course, i am grateful, but somehow i still question myself: "do i deserve this?". i am a bumiputra, so when people say non-bumi scorers didn't get PILN, i was taken aback. why did i get this, and not them? what if someone needs it more that i need it? not to say that i am from a rich family, but i believe my parents can afford to send me to local IPTA for my studies. makes me wonder, this opportunity i am given, although i believe God fated it for me, maybe, just maybe, if someone whose financial state is worse than mine is given the opportunity - maybe it'll be more worthy? maybe it'll make a whole lot more of a difference.



"opportunity knocks but only once, yin" - my heart whispered.
why don't i just accept it and make full use of this opportunity to study hard, get my degree, and come back to serve my nation? yes, the only approach to this situation is i've promised to study real hard and not to take it for granted. it is not a privilege, it's a responsibility. we're using the people's money, they've worked to earn, feed their kids and paid taxes. being a government scholar is never about the fame or the bragging rights because after our studies, we'll work in the government, for the people.



"yes, the people" - i assured myself.
we study for them, we work for them, we serve them. not the political party that runs the government, not the royal family that leads our constitution - but the people of Malaysia, regardless of their race and faith.

yes, i want to educate people to love themselves, how each and everyone of my patient is so precious. i want the entire nation to appreciate themselves with the only way possible – take a good care of their own body. and i strongly believe that an education supported by using people’s money, who pay taxes every year, should be giving back to what they’ve paid for, and this i aim to achieve.

insyaAllah, i'll do my best in IB. lillahitaa'la :)

so dear friends, jpa/mara or any scholars, even those who're studying in IPTAs and pre-u program provided allowance every month, be grateful that we're given financial aid from the government. whether it's PIDN or PILN, be thankful that we had at least secured a place to continue our studies.

always believe that this is part of Allah's wonderful plan in our life. as for those brilliant students who didn't get a scholarship, perhaps God is moulding them and preparing them for something even greater.

remember, taking the scholarship for granted and not doing their best is like stealing people's money.

and for this i would like to wish everyone: all the best! :)

assalamualaikum :D

1.1.11

everything just went and happened so fast, all of them are still very clear in my mind. like how i started my form 5, my birthday, the struggles, the friends, the-nearly-break-up-friend, the day i stepped into new room meeting new roomates, the loud singing in dorm and the other dorm, as well as the bilik study and etc lahh! heee :D

and especially how i've become so matured after my failure (well, just recently). nahh, no worries, i'm moving on, btw, congratulations to those who succeed! :D

even though it all went by so fast but last year was a roller coaster ride! i really wish it wouldn't end. :(

last year, i've achieved most of the things i wanted. i stayed in track & field, been beating myself up just to loose some weight (and apparently i lost 3kg, but it turned back to 45 since it was just water lost -.-). i've been a good girl, most of the time ;p and most of all, i did travel a LOT :D

i've grown up and have been using my brain a little bit more. i've stayed to who I am instead of caring about what others have to say. i met best friend, good friends, true friends; true love? haha, nah, not yet. gahh, i've been up, i've been down and i've been somewhere in between. (?)

okay, anywho; these are my new year's resolutions people :)

1. get closer to Allah. insyaAllah :)

2. no more self-destructing-diet. hehe, beat myself up though, keep on exercising (tennis drilling. HAHA)

3. work hard. earn money, SAVE MONEY. for abah and mumy and beli camera BARU :)

4. go to PERLIS (since this is the only ceruk i haven't reached. hihi)

5. widen my knowledge, just about everything.

6. always be prepared for any tests or exams. to be short, stop being the last minute person. 'cause you'll die. owh, YOU WILL DIE -.-

7. improve my cooking skill. master japanese, korean and JAVANESE cuisine. YUM YUM

8. DO NOT skip meals. any meal, especially BREAKFAST.

9. be a good good girl. listen to parents, no more prissy princess of me -.-

10. last but not least, keep on motivating myself. i can always improve, kan?

oooh, did i mention that i finished high school?! *can i get a woooot???!* hehe ;)

well, 2010 was my senior year at mrsm tawau. After 3 bloody years of being a junior in st patrick then another 1 frigging year in mrsm tawau as form 4 student, i finally became a senior. life was pretty hectic but i wouldn't have it any other way. i mean, i juggled everything; from my studies, my student council duties, assembling and leading the exco kesenian & kebudayaan, my math society, emcee for school regular occassions, my crazy extra class schedules, random girls'(& guys' + juniors') dramas and of course embracing change. i did have some family & friends time in between all of that. thanks, thanks a lot :)

wowww, i have quite a list there. oh myy, i did all of that in one year. haha, i feel soo old. i'll recap some other time.


oh, and for those who're going to serve for the country tomorrow (PLKN), or whenever the time laa, hihi, good luck guys! and sorry for the no-picture-post, i'm really not in the mood. i don't know, due to the early month, or maybe some things that happened last month, or, i suppose, last year. i don't know, just not in the mood and i promise, i'll be back with a smile. i'll be fine of course, it just takes some time. once again, thanks blog for hearing this little tiny voice.

happy new year. may Allah bless all of us and may 2011 become a better year than ever. hope so, amin :)

i'm sorry 'cause seriously this entry has no title -.-

holidays just kicked in, well, it's obvious for an SPM candidate like me. it's been mild so far, obviously i have no plans to go anywhere, well for the time being, except being stuck here, in sandakan.

last past few weeks (last month to be exact) had been rough for me i must say. spm and all, you just don't know how it feels if you've not experienced any of it. once i've done with the last paper; Bio paper 3 (on the 8th Disember), i felt so tired yet happy, didn't expect that tense smile could possibly etch on my face but still worrying of the upcoming results. i've learned a lot though; faith, patience, discipline, respect, and definitely relationship with the others, especially with friends, teachers, family and most of all Allah. they had been sticking with me, in good times; bad times. hah, thanks :)


the word in 'love' above is pronounced as 'AI', means, love :)



don't look at these, you'll be laughing at me -.-



but if interested, kindly click to enlarge

hah! it's been a while since i last had my manual blog - diary. now i have it again, so altogether, they're four. haha, good times. it's nice to see what i've written few years back. some were even 4-5 years ago and i'm still in awe. it tickles me deep inside to see how different i've become. the way i write, the way i speak to people and the way i even think, last but not least, the WRITINGS. (turning out to be worse these days). it's amazing really, even though only i have the ability to see the changes. i can see myself grow up. i really do. being matured is another part of the whole thing. in just two years, my maturity have been tested. trying to cope up with others' level of maturity is real HARD! you'll fall, fall into the unseen trap of childishness. trust me.

just when I'm recovering, something always happens to drag me down again. see? but, God won't test us with things we can't handle right? i'll be fine. of course :)

btw, i'm reading again. i have to admit to being a little confused – from the world of vampires in the Twilight Saga we now move to alien life forms invading earth...perhaps Stephenie had gone sci-fi, LOL.

whatever happened to her, she's an incredibly awesome author that i would definitely recommend any of her novels, and you will be hundred percent SATISFIED :) she posseses the ability to pull the reader into the story and allow them to feel like they are actually there with the characters, experiencing what they experience and feeling what they feel. she even paints a vivid picture of the characters and their lives in the mind of every reader who is fortunate enough to be touched by the worlds that she creates. it's like being in 3-d theater but better, its actually more like being in a 6-D theater, touching all of the human senses and emotion at once.

well yeah, this novel does stand up to the standards set by her preceding works. but despite of the creative story line and captivating emotions shown in The Host, i could not stop myself from finding many links between this novel and the Twilight series in regards to the characters, their emotions and their interconnected relationships, everything. Jared, from (The Host) could be very similar to Jacob (Twilight). both have a tendency to let their emotions get the best of them, both are somewhat selfish creatures in regards to the one that they love, and most of all they're extremely stubborn. Ian (The host) and Edward (Twilight) are the same way, comparatively, overly protective and somewhat irrational when it comes to the people that they love, both have the ability to love unconditionally despite the fact that both men love someone of a different species, and both men's brothers try to kill their partners and the greatest character similarity, however, exists between Wanderer/Melanie (The Host) and Bella (Twilight).

read this and you'll find stephanie is the best of all.




besides reading, i need a constant supply of games, just like my sugar supply, i need sufficient supply of ice cream, cakes, cupcakes, red M&Ms, dark/bitter chocolate. but i prefer it in a manual way, 'cause you'll be able to cheat (referring the answer sheets? ;p). haha, no one knows! if they did, why bother? ;p

yes, exactly, SUDOKU is the best of all! :D


papers, mags, templates etc, you'll find the same thing published just at the corner of the sudoku's grid ; sudoku puzzles are based on logic, you do not need to guess where numbers fit to solve the puzzles. fill in each grid so that every row, every column and every 3 times 3 box contains the number one to nine -.-


unlike the vampires, i won't show up at nights. foes, friends and family might be thinking i've had my beautiful dreams in bed, apparently, i slept even later than the owls did. lol. movies marathon, i prefer doing it all by myself. besides, marathon always goes for charity, right? yeah, i'm staying up late just to protect the whole neighbourhood from burglars...that is a charity. ;p

for the record, i had finished 3 korean drama series since the day i'm done with spm; Autumn in My Heart, Boys Over Flower and Master Of Study. looking forward to Kim Hyun Joong's drama series, Playful Kiss? hah, haven't decide to watch it online or just buy the disc. and HBO, MAX and STARMOVIES always have sufficient supply of movies for me, thanks. watched Pearl Habor like for three times. (i'm so in love with danny. hee ;p) and since my sister had a huge crush on daniel radcliffe plus the star movies channel is currently having their movies festive due to the coming christmas, i had to watch harry potter for like hundred times in every series; 'platform nine and three quarter? there's no such thing, is there?' or maybe 'wicked! you're harry potter! so, it's true then, harry potter had come to Hogwarts' (you need to pronounce these in bloody English, then you'll get the mood -.-)

speaking of BLOODY ENGLISH, i remembered 'Wild Child' movie. i've got to watch it all over again, well, it reminds me of boarding school's life :)

by the way, my sister (who's going to be the next top model spm candidate next year) introduced me their brand new form five novel - The Curse.



i wonder; will it be as good as The Pearl, the former novel. once i saw it, i think i liked it right away. i'm not really sure why but i think because of it’s size, number of pages and the COVER. hehe ;p

for the ignorant i am, i never heard of Lee Su Ann before. let alone about the novel being the second prizewinner in the English Novel Category of the Utusan Group’s Young Adult Literature Competition of 2005. but with such tag, i couldn’t help myself from putting high hopes as how good the story would be and though it didn’t exceed my expectation; at least it had met it. exactly, the story was good enough to make me glued to it; turning from page to page without wanting to stop.

bear in mind that this is just my personal point of view of the book; after i‘ve read it. The Curse in summary (trying not to spoil anything -.-) has the elements that i’d love to have in a novel as a whole: thrill and suspense, a bit of horror, a little of romance and a pinch of family drama. besides, it was a compensation for all that comes in the believable portrayal of the rural Malay village and its inhabitants. i think it is very much why i liked it as much as i did.

it was about jealousy, revenge, mulut tempayan and of course, forgiveness. i’m pretty sure that the story would be interesting enough for the juniors, including my sister; that is if they have the will to go through the moderately difficult language, and then they'll have to at least take a glimpse at the former novel, The Pearl (which requires a higher level of proficiency). but i found this novel interesting somehow as the plot a bit messy and difficult with flashbacks all over the story (some from different characters’ point of views). my advice, read this but don't forget to read The Pearl as well :)



besides indoor activities, i did involve into outdoor activities, like tossing the trash into the dustbin OUTSIDE my house, clean up the house compound and BBQ! reminiscing every stupid acts we did during the BBQ (didn't quite remember when) at Yatch Club, to all of a sudden; missing them, my st patricks's folks. they ARE crazy :D

our farewell group photo right after BBQ

well, guess it's way too long for now. till then everyone and good morning! i woke up early just to make this long entry. hihi, and btw, about my trip to Beluran yesterday, it was cool, somehow. it's my first time going there. get to know and to actually see a new place was exactly what i had in mind since holidays began. looking forward to meeting new places and friends. but i think i have to figure out how to get a sufficient budget first -.-


salam :D

bloody muddy field.

awful sports day.
thank God it's the last time for me :)
watch this.



kasian orh. have to run in mud. bloody hell.


sukantara part two.

memories.

grr, it's been two weeks i've become some jakuns who didn't touch any media electronics except for some stupid radio purchased in giant. i miss my mp4 you know! i strongly disagree that mp4 is not allowed in that so-called prison! but mp3 in the other hand, is allowed. stupid rules.

haiyaa, i don't have mp3 laa...

there, we spent most of our time for meals. stupid timetable, we eat six times per day. my fatty acids and glycerol will difinitely increase rapidly, soon, one month after or maybe a week? NO. that's the reason why i skipped meals for several times. yeaa, who wants to get fat?

but the food is not that bad, quite nice if compared at least it's better than the one in MRSM Koki. and fyi, for these whole two weeks, i washed my very own laundry MANUALLY aka using hands! OMG, it's so abussive. you can't abuse children with laundry! stupid dobi. but thank God, dobi will officially usable next week. gahh.

i met lots of people there. genius, nerdy, horrible, prostitude-looking, mean girls, uh-so perasan prince charming, indecent geek guys, you name it. overall, new school is awesome!

and sheena, really, lots of hotties there. hoho, i think i crush on someone. hoho. kidding. and teehee, i got admirers. hihi. perasan sudaa.

take care people, that's all for the time being. gtg back at 2pm. urgh, i hate rules.


btw, i have some pics for you guys, sweet memories, pleasent viewing. :)
















I MISS SM ST PATRICK, FAZRINA, VALERIE, REBECCA, YVONNE, JULAYHA, JULIANA, AND 4 BERLIANS.
not to forget sheena, fatney, eiya, iman and hanis.

I MISS YOU ALL :(

friendship.

brass band had a farewell dinner for me today which made me totally touched. we had it in Rasa Sayang, one of the best restaurants in Tawau and the food are really nice.

we had a lot of fun. not really. not as we used to be.
we just don't know how to enjoy ourselves just now.
sad? happy? not at all. heavy-hearted to be exact.



it's been years i've joined brass band and it's really impossible to just forget everything in minutes. i'll miss the retarded president, the totally crazy vice president, ME and all the brass band's members.

i still remember those hard times i've been through in Brass Band. each and every drop of tears and laughters. we shared almost everything, those yellow jokes, those critics on one pondan we've met , those retarded acts from each and everyone of us etc. i'll remember those simple things, even the littlest single thing, i'll bear in my mind.

as for me, myself, i had an arguement before with my ex-bestfriend. we used to be a pair of real bestfriends that no one could ever seperate us. we're that close till we didn't even dare to hurt each other. we used to share the same passion, the same interests, the same car to school aka 'carpooling' and even the same co-curricular unit, Brass Band.

let's call her J. J and i are friends till now but not as close as we used to be. some arguement break our relationship. it's no one's fault actually. it's just that both of us are ego, didn't wanna compromise, didn't wanna negotiate at all. it then became worse till we didn't talk to each other for several months. we didn't even text, didn't even talk, didn't even look at each other. we ignored each other till one day, both of us realized that we're both fool. we lost our friendship just because of misunderstanding. but, it was too late. even the most sincere apology couldn't heal our pain. yes, we become friends again but not as close as we used to be. everything just changed and yeah, i lost my friend.

FRIENDSHIP IS PRICELESS, SO APPRECIATE IT WHILE YOU HAVE IT.

i promise i won't repeat the same mistake. i'll appreciate everything i have, friendship, relationship, family and most of all ALLAH, who always help me in every thing i do.


look at the cute lil teddy!


our very own Brass Band keychain :)


MONEY MONEY $$

so, these are my presents for my farewell. huh, having some hard time typing here. won't elaborate more. i had another farewell with my malay friends tomorrow. until my next farewell post, ily :)

birthday :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME AND WAWA :D



my voice sucks too. nvm, as long as you understand wth i'm singing about. hoho.

this is just for you my dear wawa, and me as well. teehee :)

well, actually, i'm extremely happy today cause my friends and i had our very own school photography disaster, in the other word, camwhoring session. i'll upload those pics, but not today, just not today.

i've no idea how to write about today cause too many things happened in all of a sudden, including the sport stuff, those muddy disgusting field, those flirty slutty bitches, the worst rainy day ever, those cute acts from exboyfriend, those camwhoring prostitudes etc.
*wont elaborate more on this part. xD

so, back to the main topic, birthday. fyi, i shared birthdate with 4 persons whom i knew in school or through net. namely wong pui yee, tay, hazman and WAWA :D

but today, i'm going to talk about my best online buddy ever, whom i haven't meet yet. wawa.


she's really cute!

she shares the same birthdate with me. yeah, she's my lost and found twins. LOL. she's totally crazy, talkative, sporting, great pc user and really pro in html thingy and codes. i knew her from friendster and when i realized she had the same birthday with me, we're then become closer to each other and now we're considered as best online buddy, kan wawa? hihi :)

i know she's different. just different from the others. she's like really kind, really fun to talk to, and she even introduced me this blogger. that's the reason why i own this blog.

so, thank you, wawa. for everything, for this friendship, for html codes you've shared with me, for those hard time we've been through before pmr, for those craps we've shared, just for everything. i love you wawa :D

my colourful post :)

OMG, i'm so touched. my classmates made a farewell for me and for those who're leaving. guess what, they made a card for every of us and i cried. :((

i've been studying with them for three years, shared our tears and laughter and today was the last day studying in the class cause after tomorrow, we'll have our annual sports days. shit sukantara tomorrow. urgh, sooner or later, i'll become some dark-charcoal creature. that's why i hate sukan but i love my brass band and my rumah sukan, BALUNG. anyways, i'll try my best for Balung tomorrow! :D

fyi, it's my birthday tomorrow!
hoho, i'm hap-hap-happy!! :D
weeeeeeeeeee!

happy birthday to me,
happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to NABILA and WAWA,
and we're turning sixteen! :D

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
AMAZING SCIENCE FACT,
after making some observation in the mirror today, the experiment shows that my wrinkles are gradually increased due to the metabolism and genetics effect. so, the hypothesis is accepted. i'm aging. O.o

BOOHOO! i'm getting older!

ignore those craps. highlight of the day,
i'm turning 16 tomorrow ! :D

p.s : i'll upload my farewell pics after sports day. lazy to do it now, plus this shitty internet line, i give up.

ecstatic !

Alhamdullilah :)

Praise Allah, i got the offer. yes, i manage to get into MRSM which is a stone's throw away from my house. yea, MRSM TAWAU and i'm hap-hap-happy!! :D



see? teehee :)
yes, i'm moving, i'm moving and yes, i'm moving.

well, i'm not that happy actually. just wanna be some normal student who's extremely excited, screaming like some groggy, jumping like monkeys in Sepilok etc. but apparently, i'm not. maybe a lil bit sad leaving SM St Patrick. :(

whatever it is, i have to face the music. no matter what happen next. my life's gonna change fully. i'll be living in a boarding school and life gets harder. urgh, i'll definitely get homesick and of course, i'll miss everyone here, in blogspot.

i'm gonna miss you all :[

THIS IS MY BEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER !
i'm really grateful and thankful for everything.
alhamdulillah :)

stupidity.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR

hey hey people, it's chinese new year and i was grounded at home. life's getting stupid these days and i kept getting myself involved with some stupid stuff. you know, busy with school stuff, brass band, prefects board etc. while my friends? they've become more insane studying too much. this is one of the examples.


right click to enlarge

see? my classmate, yvonne had discovered a brand new mixture of literature component and chemistry long-winded formula. pity her, she studied too much. LOL. just kidding yvonne.

since today was chinese new year, so we got some cny's eve celebration last night. we're not chinese laa weyh. just having some integration celebration, it's fun what. we went to pizza, met my uncle and aunt plus my lil cousins. they're having their dinner there. they are totally wild that would drive people crazy. get some prove, i went nuts last night. people in pizza hut are staring at me like hell while i was entertaining my lil cousins. don't blame me, that's a natural phenomenon. to them, i'm totally a freak. stupid heh?

and yesterday too, when i finished my bath, i got message from kay. gosh, i didn't expect her to get my number from myaa just to invite me joining her trip to kk. hoho. she's terribly desperate going to kk. i think she craved on her Big Mac that much. LOL. she kept asking me if i could join her or not but to my and her disappointment, i can't make it. my mom would nag me all day long for going to kk alone. and this morning, she had enjoyed her hols in kk. i think she ate her Big Mac for her lunch today. just kidding, kay.

grr, yesterday, yeah, yesterday, some stranger text me. and to my surprise, the one who text me was sis dyan's cousin, who is my schoolmate surprisingly. sis dyan told him about me. we text all day long yesterday. he's quite a nice person and he's form 5 this year. hoho. a coincidence heh? so now, we're friends :)

that's all about stupidity. until my next stupider post, chow ! xD

random.

why does the hottest guys have the ugliest and bitchiest girlfriend's?? tell me, i just dont get it.. its weird.. =.=

grabbed this from sheena's blog. i was wondering that too. it's just weird. why don't they just get some normal girlfriends? anywho, i've no answer for your question too sheena. perhaps iman will help yaa :)

btw, i'm so lucky today. fortunately, i didn't get punished by YSS. fuhh. i was asked about those atomic models and thank God i manage to answer it. almost everyone was punished but it was only some 50 times copy thing. sooner or later, we'll have that 200++ times copy paste thingy. urgh, we're totally stressed out when it comes to chemist. but anyway, i'll try my best to be 'fortunate' forever, is it possible?

and sheena, i am currently addicted to your favourite song, i'm still breathing by katy perry. that song means a lot. no wonder you love it so much. haha. :D

and to all my so-called fans, this is not a real update people. just crave on writing something. plus, i haven't watch tv for decades. hell i don't know what's going on around me, even the dog next door. i wonder if he's still alive or not. urgh, school really makes me look like a hard-core-stereotyper.


ignore it. it's just some craps. until my next post people! :D

emo.

current status: exhausted + emo

i got myself some sports today. it's not some volunteer stuff, it's compulsory. so, i'm on it. it was a 6km rentas desa. i ran alone. actually i got some friends at first, but we lost track so i gotta go on my own. like usual, we always get the same track, the one which includes stadium + taman ria *totally undefined which taman ria is* + serudung power etc.

i was targeting to be at least the 15th for the perempuan A category but i didn't manage to get it. i was the 17th.

and'and'and, something happened today. something unusual. i guess.
when i was in the midst of running, some familiar shadow appeared behind me. it was him to my surprise. i just ignored him. so do him. did he? we're running together for quite a time. but i kept ignoring him. after a while, his shadow was no longer exists in my sight. so, i kept on running on my own, again.

to be honest, it's kinda awkward once you saw your ex. a lil guilty, awkwardness, ashamed, it just freaked me out. i was trying to be natural in front of him, play it like i'm having an awesome time, stop noticing him, but i just CAN'T. how am i suppose to do all those things? i love him.

i just don't know how to be friend with him. FRIENDS. yeah, it's easy to be a guy's friend, but once you've been together, it kinda messes things up. you know, it's just too awkward.

i still remember when i decided to break up with him, i bawled for a month straight. i was that upset, bemused. i couldn't decide, neither bad nor good; neither right nor wrong. it's just so wrong. nothing's going right. everything turned upside down. i broke down for almost a month and for the consequences, i lost almost of my tears. LOL.

i was like --- i don't wanna look pretty anymore; i wanna look more like hard-core. terrible, isn't it?

but it was totally ridiculous when i think it back. i think i'm healing from those damages and i'm improving our relationship. i mean relationship as friends. maybe he had forgotten everything that happened between us, but i won't.
you know i won't. you mean a lot to me. even that one month, you're just too special for me.

will you stay awake for me?
'cause i don't wanna miss anything
but i'll definitely miss you. i love you

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

back to sports issue, BALUNG was the first runner up right now with 700++ marks. a lot of thanks to those who've contributed marks for BALUNG including me :)

so, keep up the good work and don't give up, BALUNG!

i'm a nerd.

thank God i'm still here to give another post for you guys. 5 days of school was like 5 years of life. i can barely alive in school, with the hustle and bustle, plus the tonnes of homework, i can finally survive without internet! i didn't touch my pc since tuesday and it was a really'really remarkable achievement! cheers for me :D

now, interprets your mind with some school stuff,
lots of things happened within 5 days. first of all, i've got a really'really special credit from my very'very own principal. i repeat, PRINCIPAL. teehee :)

it's soo unbelievable! i was 'declared' as the best PMR student for 2008 in the assembly! ahha! i even took photograph with Mr Tung himself in his office and apparently, IT WAS PUBLISHED IN SOME LOCAL NEWSPAPER, namely Borneo Post and Si Hua newspaper. gosh, i was extremely flattering! my hater would be hating me more 'cause her results is not 'declared' like mine. she even cheated me that she got 6As but apparently, it's worse than that. HAHA. i'm really'really grateful to Allah for this achievement. Alhamdulillah. :)

so, about my next major exam, the freaking SPM, i decided not to take too much subjects. it's killing me. 9 is more than enough. i didn't take prinsip akaun, sains sukan. bahasa cina is a BIG no-no of course *enough for pmr, same goes to EST and seni? NO.

let's just have some rewind for each subjects.

BAHASA MALAYSIA
Madam Ku is the teacher. she's a good teacher. maybe it gets boring sometimes, but at least she's way much better than WSL. HAHA.

BAHASA INGGERIS
we get the same teacher this year. my friends call her Rihanna, due to her hair i guess. but anyway, i've no comment bout her. 'cause she gave me high marks for english last year. her real name, Mdm Lee Fui Ping. her husband is a white people.

MODERN MATH
Miss Leong teaches us. she loves to play sign language before her lesson which i've no idea what to do with math. sometimes, she makes something simple become something extremely hard, let's just say, her thinking is soo complicated.

ADDITIONAL MATH
"what's up?" is his favourite phrase. he often makes us laugh but he seldom makes us digest what he taught. if you get what i mean. and i still remember the first thing he said to us in his first class, "if you wanna become an engineer, your add math must be good, or else, the buildings you've built will collapse, people will die.... and it's fun" wtf? so, that's Mr Chua aka Ah Chua.

BIOLOGY
i love this subject so there's no problem with the teacher for the time being. the teacher is Mdm Wong San San, our form teacher as well.

CHEMISTRY
i love the teacher. Miss Yee San San is a good teacher. she's strict and her teaching is crystal clear. she explains everything. but according to my seniors, they'll get punished if they didn't memorise chemist formula and to my surprise, they're punished up to 200 times for each mistake. O.o

PHYSICS
physics is more like math, involve calculations, formulas so on and off. Miss Fanny is a great teacher, her class is interesting and i'll never get bored with it. :D

AGAMA ISLAM
ustaz Azhar is ok. not much problem as i'm officially wearing tudung to school right now.

SEJARAH
a big applause 'cause Mdm Kartina is teaching us for this subject! yay! cheers fo her! she's a hyper-duper great teacher! she makes sejarah interesting and yeaa, thank God. :D

so, that's my 9 subjects. simple right? taking more than that will only 'cause headache. besides, i'm gonna take meds for my further study, so what for taking so much unimportant subjects? boohoo!

my only desire right now, is to score those three science subjects especially chemist and bio and get into MRSM. amin. :)

and one more thing, I FALL INTO ADD MATHS.
I LOVE ADD MATHS. i heart add maths
special credits to my big bro and sir Karu. not to forget, Mr Chua. :)